I’m the Bag Lady!

No particular reason for inserting this picture except for the fact that it cracks me up every time I see it AND that the Commander is in this little vignette of my day.

Today, after church, a group of us trooped down to the Fellowship Hall to volunteer to stuff 5,000 bags with brochures that will be hung on doors around our community soon in an outreach campaign.  We listened to the instructions which consisted of….1.  Find a partner and 2.  One of you put the brochures into a specific order and the other hold open the bag for the brochures to be stuffed in.  The bagger was supposed to keep count and when there were ten filled bags, the bagger was supposed to tie the bags together with a ribbon so there would be groups of ten filled bags.

A friend and I grabbed the brochures and empty bags and we started our assembly line going.  She assembled the brochures and I handled the bags.  After we’d been doing this for awhile, the Commander showed up.  I told him we’d be done in a bit but he sat down and started grabbing brochures and stuffing them in bags and then throwing the bags on my pile.

“Honey, how many bags did you just put on there?  I’m trying to keep count,” I said.

“I don’t know”, he replied and kept on stuffing and slinging them.

“Well, hold on.  I have to have just ten bags in a group.  Don’t keep putting them on here.  Start your own pile,”  I suggested.

He switched gears and began a pile of his own but when he came up short and needed another bundle of brochures, he reached over and grabbed a set from a neighboring team.  Now I happened to have observed the other team carefully arranging these brochures in groups of ten.

“Honey,  you can’t do that.  You just messed up their piles.”

“What difference does it make which pile it comes from?  They’re all the same brochures,”  he answered.

“But now they have a pile that is going to come out short,” I replied.

He looked at me and then reached over, grabbed some of our brochures and plopped them back on the other team’s pile.  I looked at his pile of filled bags.

“You have some bags with the brochures facing down and some with them facing up.  They should all be facing up, don’t you think?”  I suggested.

“Why”, he challenged.

“Because it looks neater that way,” I countered.

It was a stalemate.

I glanced over at the other team, who were giving me the old fish eye.  “And that’s why you never have two leaders on the same team,” I told them.

“Look, Honey.  I’m the bag lady.  Why don’t you go around and collect the filled bags or something?  We’ll be done here shortly.”

Once he’d gone, I turned to my partner and said, “We just don’t work well together.  We both have really strong ideas of how things should be done.”

“But your marriage has worked well,” she said.

“That’s because we learned a long time ago that we just can’t work together on anything,” I laughed.  “It’s even uglier when you get us both in the same canoe.  Lord have mercy!”

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